Stability

Published on 11 September 2015  |  Posted by Cheryl  |  Filed under Healing Parkinson's Disease

It has been a while since my last update and a lot has happened over the last two months. I have seen changes in my life and my body that I would never have believed could be possible had I not experienced it myself. Even friends have been aware of the changes in me.

The Ups and Downs of My Journey with Parkinson’s

There are a lot of different people who read this blog. Some of them have an interest in health, some are people with Parkinson’s and other diseases. The rest have been my supportive friends.

I was asked recently if I had to read this blog a year ago, how would I have reacted to it if I had found it. I replied that it would naturally be of interest to me, but i would have read it with a bit of scepticism.

I am grateful to have been able to experience it firsthand and to see the change happen in my life. Even though I still can’t believe some of the change that is happening in my life and body myself.

What I want to convey is that it has not been an easy journey. I am not trying to sell a fantasy or sell false hope with my story. I am a human and just an ordinary person who wanted to get better and was willing to do anything to do that. I didn’t get to where I am because of some miraculous feat. It has been a result of a lot of determination, pain and hard work.

In the past I personally didn’t want to hear about good news, laugh or talk about my disease or even share it with other people. Everyone I have ever met with Parkinson’s is afraid to talk about it or even admit that it is there.

I believe that In order to change, you need to explore and go into the dark spaces we are afraid to look at. If we open our minds and try something new we never know what we might find.

To anyone facing an extremely challenging situation like Parkinson’s, don’t be afraid to talk about it with someone else. There is nothing to be ashamed of and it is not a death sentence.

I hope to provide a new perspective on what is possible for people living with this disease. In the past I had spent a lot of time looking for solutions and have never found evidence of someone getting better from this disease or even improving like I have over the last few months. There have been many ups and downs on this journey of healing. But right now there is more stability in my life, emotions and body than I have experienced for a long, long time. It has taken a lot of hard work and has been very challenging, but the work is paying off.

 

Catch Up

It hasn’t been plain sailing though getting to this point. At the time of my previous post I was in a really good space both physically and emotionally, however things started to unravel again shortly after. I experienced another emotional and physical downward spiral and I thought all the work I had done had been for nothing. I felt depressed, I found it difficult to walk, my speech got worse and I began experiencing slight tremors in my hands and legs again.

It began when I had a few quiet days at home alone, where I started going into a depression again. There was also a big trigger that stirred up a lot of stress and anxiety in me, which led to physical my physical symptoms getting worse again. It was personal issue that I still needed to sort out. I have been told by my DBS technician that when I am sick or under severe stress, the symptoms will reappear.

However there seemed to be a resolution coming and my symptoms started getting better on their own. Surviving this multi-year long challenge and finally seeing it coming to end has made me feel stronger, more confident and optimistic about my life.

 

Stability

Stability is not a word usually associated with someone with Parkinson’s. Physically it is a “disease” that has had severe consequences on my body and my ability to move. On an emotional level Parkinson’s had an even worse effect on my life. At this moment in time and over the last month I have experienced more stability on a physical, mental and emotional level than I have in a long time. When you consider how much has been happening over the last few months I am amazed with myself for how much has happened, changed and what I have been able to accomplish.

Publishing this blog and sharing my story on this blog has been one of those major accomplishments. I have received so many positive responses to the blog. It has only been up for a few months People from around the world are starting to read it and spend hours on the blog. My YouTube videos have been viewed over 900 times and my story is going to be shared on an online health magazine called MindBodyGreen. Tens of thousands of people will read my story.

It has been scary process, but I am grateful for all the positive feedback from all of my friends and people who have read the blog.

The question has been whether or not this improvement in my health would remain stable and last longer than a few days or weeks. Only time will tell whether or not I have been healed or the work Martin and I have done will stay or even get better, but I seem to be getting better as time passes.

 

Emotional Stability

Happiness is not something I am used to and I still find it a bit weird when people ask me how I am doing and I use happy as a word to describe how I feel. There is a level of emotional stability that I am experiencing that I keep describing as happy and it is something I experience more of every week. It is ironic that I am writing this blog about huge change in my life when 12 months ago if I found this blog myself I would’ve read it with doubt and scepticism.

I am still taking my daily dose of anti-depressants, however I am looking at slowly decreasing my daily dosage soon with the help of my doctor. I tried stopping them a few months ago, but I was not ready for the wave of emotions that came from stopping as well as the withdrawal symptoms I felt when I stopped taking them.

 

Physical Stability

The physical improvement I have experienced over the last few months has continued. There are times I struggle with my speech if I am feeling fear or anxiety. But overall I have been able to speak with clarity and ease. I am able to easily pick up the phone and call who I need to without the fear of needing someone to be patient with me as I try to get my words out.

At this moment the only evidence of my Parkinson’s is a tremor in my right leg. My hands are as steady as a rock and I have been able to spend my time working on my art and creating my miniatures.

As I mentioned at times the symptoms return and I always get scared that they are going to get worse again, but they seem to get better after a few days.

 

Hands as Steady as a Rock:

I am able to confidently work on my miniatures again with stability in my hands.

 

Off my Parkinson’s Medication

There has been another completely unexpected event that has happened over the last month. There was a period where I got very busy with work and my art. I ended spending hours a day just completely absorbed in my miniatures. I was so focused that I ended up forgetting to take my Parkinson’s medication. I noticed that whether or not I took the medication my overall condition remained constant. It did not have any effect on the tremor in my leg or any other Parkinson’s symptoms. I slowly began taking less and less Parkinson’s medication.

I am grateful to announce that I am completely off my Parkinson’s disease medication and I am still able to fully function and live my life. I am not sure if this has ever happened to anyone with Parkinson’s before so I think it’s an important milestone worth mentioning. It is something I am really grateful for and of course I am saving money I used to spend monthly on the medication.

Career, work and productivity

Over the last few months I have been more productive, active and spending more time on my work I have for a long time. My confidence with my ability to work has completely returned and I am really enjoying doing what I am doing. I was invited to and attended the Betty's Bay Miniature convention this past month. I will share more information about the Fair on a separate blog post.

Also the building of Gulliver’s Nook has finally been completed. I hope to begin teaching workshops from Gulliver’s Nook in the near future. I will also be selling my miniatures, art supplies through the store soon.

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